is this us?

why do people take everything so personally?
why do people like to say things that aren't necessary?
why are some people 2 faced?
why do some people have 2 different personalities,
one infront of others and one when nobody's looking?
who do people do that?
is it fun?
is this us?

you're not what you have.

you're not your job.
you're not how much money you have in your wallet.
you're not the car you drive.
you're not the contents of your wallet.
you're not special.

you're the same decaying organic matter as everything else.
you're the all-singing, all-dancing fucking crap of the world,
and we're all part of the same compost heap.

learnt

the lesson or principle contained in or taught by a fable,
is based on strong likelihood or firm conviction,
rather than on the actual evidence.

john shaun

john shaun was blonde and didn't care at all.
lol.
now here's what i did today. i watched the 1st season of oc on dvd. that's pretty much it.

and i've been thinking. i wanna live in a house which has a basement. like the 70's show man!!

i'm pretty mssed up in my head right now and maybe yesterday too. i think i scared the shit out of ariff last night. maybe i was high, maybe i was not. cos if someone's high, wld they be able to remember what happened on the previous day? im not sure, that's why im asking.
but i know nobody's reading, so i guess there'll be no answers to my lame qn.

i really think i shld lose some weight. maybe not some, maybe a lot. i need to get thin by next raye so that i won't be mistaken for being the oldest one. so that leaves me like, a whole year to do so. need to cut back on food. no, not food cos i love it. just the junky ones and more
veggies = good. maybe i shld be a vegetarian or something since i don't take much meat unless its chicken cos i love chicken, BUT I HAVE LOW BLOOD PRESSURE. maybe i shld stop eating rice cos i eat that like every 6 hrs? im not sure but i think i do. plus rice is so fattening.
gosh, i didnt realise that im eating so much in a day until i write it down.

_|_

screw the 1st day of raye.
it was such a disaster,
cos father was a fucking jerk.

now i know why some people love to watch korean dramas.
i wanna buy or at least rent the dvds for the korean drama
which is showing on channel U at 7pm from mondays to fridays.

hahahahahahahaha.
shut up.

holidays

school holidays are gonna be fucking over soon.
oh, glory glory glory!
soon, there'll be
no more feeling fucking empty at home.
no more fucking laundry days.
no more fucking cleaning here and there.
one thing im gonna miss is,
sitting on my ass,
watching dvds all day long.

i'm officially a school freak.
fucking yeah!


*watched too much dvds with vulgarities.

haham

curtains are important cos without it,
i have to stare at my younger sisters' face
until she falls asleep.
not while lying down or sitting,
but while standing cos the bed's two level high
and she's on the second level.


and oh,
i dreamt that i was stabbed 4 times,
at 4 different timings,
by the same mad man.

time

why waste your time on somebody who does'nt waste their time on you?

choice

some people just tend to forget,
tend to ignore,
and become silent.

some do it on purpose,
and for some,
they do it without knowing.

it's your choice.

miss

i miss being the only one in the bus when im on my way home.
i miss being out with my closest friends and just have fun.
i miss smoking and just giggling, while listening to the sounds surrounding me.
i miss the laughter, the joy and the cozyness of my friends' presence.

and again,
everyone's never really there.

dream.

today,
i dreamt about something even words can't describe.
or maybe i just don't know how to.
this was the dream that made me cry in my sleep.

new

a new hobby, a new buddy, a new enemy.

so yea,
my myspace account got hacked.
by who?
i don't really know, but if i do,
the person's gonna pay,
cos now,
im a really angry person.

\m(^_^)m/
thank you.

never

and everyone's never really there.

dont

don't worry, i'll catch you.

o

i wanna live in your existence.

d

i felt the loneliest yesterday,
but thanks Brian and Azri for making my day.
=D

kinda

sometimes i think it's kinda funny,
sometimes i think it's kinda sad.
oh well..
*imagination*

trainwreck.

running through my life,
like a river,
like a song.
the train keeps pushing me,
right back to the place,
where i don't belong.

back along the tracks,
fly a million years.
the train moves on,
ringing in my ears.

im blowing up steam.

nature?

sometimes i feel like im being spat on the face,
sometimes i feel like im being stabbed right at the front.
hurtful and confusing,
i asked myself why they're happening.

maybe its just nature,
maybe you're made to be like that.
or maybe,
this was just one of your act.

only god knows,
but i rather not.

peace.

the days,
they pass by so quickly now,
the nights,
they're seldom long.
as time around me whispers when it's cold,
there's still so many things my mind has never known.

human story.

feel the rush beneath my veins.
electric nerves,
they communicate with tiny explosions through my brains.
who is this energy that never left or came?
give rise to passion, the only glory,
for this is the human story.

range

from this mind comes these thoughts,
one's quite tall and one's quite short.
one's quite fat and one's quite thin,
one of these thoughts i'm thinking in.

croack

when you're falling awake and you take stock of the new day,
and you hear your voice croack as you choke on what you need to say.
well, don't you fret, don't you fear,
i will give you a good cheer.

cos life is a love song,
in which i don't think i belong.

dushtak.

im having a sweet fix of a daydream of a boy,
but in reality i knew, was a hopeless to be had.
you moved like honey in my dream last night,
but as the scenery grows, i see you in a different light.

heaven knows im falling for you.

who i am hates who i've been.

i don't want you to know where i am.
cause then you'll see my heart,
in the saddest state it's ever been.

-Relient K.

hahaha.

hi fahmi, tomorrow,
12.8.2006.
it's your day man.
it's time for you and her,
to be together.

as for me,
i ate school food and almost died.
im not eating form that stall anymore.
NOT ANYMORE!

O_o
2x2=4.
me is 1.

OH YEAH!!
GAMEBOY!!

without.

without love,
life would be a mistake.

perhaps.

perhaps love,
is a view of stars,
through the telescope of years.

now aged,
no longer commited.

in chosen place,
nor fearful,
of that strident moment.

when light explodes,
into million shards of hearts.

this day and age.

like the wind,
like my softness is coming.
i admit,
that it's some kind of a harm to me.
im gorgeously funky,
but im down here and you're over there.

maybe im too scared to tell you what im thinking of.

eh, hello.

the truth for so long,
can only hide.

the truth was there,
in that same smile.

tonight,
believe the dream,
the precious sight.

we've been running in denial.

the spring of life.

i fold, in cold.
lonely but never alone.

im told, grow old.
the young, once flesh, now made into stone.

in bold, script code.
the choice is chalk,
the path is known.

why must it be this way?

the shadows we've cast.

the room won't fill with light,
but an absence.
and as it makes its way into mine,
my thoughts crawls back to your side.

i'll share my breakdowns tonight.

saturday.

the night,
filled with the sound of music.
the air,
filled with cigarettes smoke.
the earth,
filled with the living and breathing.
my brain,
filled with the excitement of going to school.

i wish i could live with the silence of the night,
the laughter of dearly ones,
the magic of love.

the stay-home disease.

if i could paint a picture of the days gone by,
i'd paint an ugly house with no colors and everything would be dull.
but being tied up in this house,
i found a perfect remedy.

and all i can only say is, all hail "The O.C"!

-_-

what is today when its yesterday's tomorrow?